It’s not always easy to get people to do things. People have their own ideas and goals, and they don’t like being told what to do. (I know I don’t!) However, sometimes you need others to carry out a task before you can move on with your work or life.
So how can you make sure that the people around you are doing things when they need to? And more importantly, how can you do this while still maintaining a positive atmosphere?
Trust me: It’s possible! Here are a few ways I’ve found success when I’ve needed other people to be active:
Takeaways |
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Understand the power of empathy in influencing behavior. |
Focus on building rapport and genuine connections. |
Provide value and address people’s needs and desires. |
Use persuasive communication without resorting to pushiness. |
Respect individual autonomy and choices. |
Let Them Know That Their Decision Is Their Own
To get people to do things without being pushy, you need to let them know that their decision is their own.
Don’t make it about you, they, the company, or any other party involved in the situation. Make it about what’s best for them as an individual.
You care about them and want them to be happy with themselves and their choices. You’re not trying to guilt-trip anyone into doing something they don’t want you’re trying to help them find pleasure in making decisions that are good for themselves first and foremost.
If someone asks for your opinion on something (for example: “Should I buy this?”), keep in mind that your response should always be phrased from a perspective of how it will affect the person asking not how it will affect YOU as an individual or as part of another group (like a team).
This might sound like an easy distinction between two words; however, when we think about our lives/situations too often we get caught up thinking about what will benefit us personally before considering if it may also benefit others around us!
We can end up forgetting all too easily how much good there is out there waiting just around the corner should only one person make one small change.”
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Play The Role Of Consultant, Not Commander
It’s a lot easier to get people to do something when they are the ones who decide that it should be done.
When you ask them, “What do you think we should do?” or “What do you think is the right thing to do here?” t
They will feel as though they have some control over the situation and this feeling of being in control helps give someone confidence in their decision-making abilities, which then usually leads them to make better decisions than before.
The more involved people are in their decision-making process, the less likely it is that they will regret those decisions later on down the line.
You can also help mitigate this risk by asking them how confident they are about making these new decisions and if any other factors might affect what decision gets made (like time pressure).
Don’t Make It About You
The key to getting people to do things is not about selling them your product or service, it’s about making sure that they see the benefits in what you’re offering. If you want someone to change their behavior, you need to make it easy for them.
You need to show how that change will benefit them, and how it won’t affect them negatively in any way.
You can’t expect people just because they work for your company or have been customers in the past, so don’t make the request seem like one more thing on top of an already full plate of responsibilities.
Instead, try making it a win-win situation where everyone wins you win because you get what you want and they win because they get what they want as well!
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Be Specific With Your Requests
The moral of the story is? Be specific.
Consider your language. Don’t use vague words like “try,” “do,” or even “maybe.” Instead, be clear about what you want someone else to do. Ask them to “take out the trash” instead of saying something like, “maybe you could help me out by taking out the trash.”
You’re more likely to get a positive response if you’re asking for a specific action rather than just hoping for one in general terms.
Give options if possible without being pushy about it—and don’t forget that no answer is an option too! If someone doesn’t want to do something (or they have another commitment), then that’s okay!
You can always leave room for other people’s interests and goals by giving them some choices as well like suggesting something else they might like doing instead of simply telling them what they should do every time something comes up:
“Wouldn’t it be fun if we went camping this weekend? Or maybe we could go see a movie instead?”
Use Positive Language
Use positive language. Using positive words is an excellent way to get people motivated to do things. When you tell someone they can do something, they believe that they can do it and will be more willing to try their best.
This is why teachers give students a lot of praise and encouragement when they are doing well on their work it gives them motivation!
Use words like “can” and “will” instead of “should,” or even better, phrases like “I will” or “I can.”
When you use these words instead of negative ones, it helps motivate the person being spoken to because no one likes feeling like they have to do something that isn’t fun for them!
It also tells them that it’s okay if there are mistakes made along the way; just keep trying until everything works out perfectly fine again…
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Ask Questions That Guide Them Towards The Right Answer
The first step to getting people to do anything is asking them. However, simply saying “please” and “would you mind…?” won’t cut it.
You need to ask the right questions to guide them towards the answer you need. To do this, you’ll want your questions to be open-ended (i.e., not yes or no), specific, relevant, important, challenging, and honest.
For example:
- Why do we think that? How did we come up with that conclusion?
- What does this mean for us going forward? What steps can we take next week based on what’s happened today?
- Who else could benefit from hearing about our progress right now—or who could help us achieve our goals faster than expected?
Highlight The Benefits Of Doing It Your Way
One of the most effective ways to get others to do what you want is by highlighting the benefits they will receive from doing it your way. Instead of just telling someone what to do, explain how it will help them.
This method is effective because when people feel like their needs are being met, they are more likely to meet yours as well.
Instead of trying to get someone else’s cooperation by forcing them into a situation that doesn’t work for them and makes them unhappy, show them why following your plan will benefit them in some way.
When using this technique, focus on emphasizing the positive aspects and benefits without being pushy or forceful about it that approach can make people feel uncomfortable and defensive. Instead, try making suggestions rather than demands:
“I think we should start doing X instead of Y because Z” instead of “You need to start doing X now!”
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Share How It Will Help You But Don’t Say “I Need You Too”
When asking people to take action, we must avoid asking them with words like “I need you to” and “I want you to.” Instead, we should use language that speaks directly about them: how their lives will be better if they do what you’re suggesting.
When I was in high school, my mom would often ask me: “What can I do for you?” And every time she asked this question, the answer was always something along the lines of “You can stop asking me what I want.”
In other words: don’t talk about yourself or your needs; talk about how someone else’s life will improve by doing what you’re suggesting.
By using positive language and avoiding negative or neutral statements you’re also creating an environment where people feel empowered by your words rather than controlled by them.
This type of positive reinforcement makes them more likely to respond positively when approached with specific requests later on down the line (or even now!).
Don’t Get Derailed By Objections
You’ve done your research and presented a compelling case for your idea. You’ve even found a way to make it more affordable. But the person who has to say “yes” still isn’t convinced, or at least not yet.
If that person is saying no, then how can you get them to say yes? Try these tactics:
Listen carefully, then respond thoughtfully. Whether they’re speaking in generalities or specifics, try not to interrupt when someone raises objections instead, listen carefully and ask questions so that you fully understand what they’re conveying.
Once you’ve got the full picture of their concerns (and any hidden ones), come up with some thoughtful responses that address those concerns directly while still being true to your vision for the project or proposal.
And then share those responses with everyone involved so that everyone understands where things stand on this issue at hand before moving forward together
Don’t get derailed by objections! If someone says “no,” keep going! It takes courage but sometimes it’s necessary if we want success (or at least progress) in our lives
Be Enthusiastic And Positive
Think about it: if you’re an avid reader, certain books made an impact on your life. Maybe it was one of your favorite childhood stories or a book you’ve read in recent years.
The point is that these books shaped who you are as a person and influenced how you see the world.
Be enthusiastic about what you want people to do without being pushy or overbearing. If they’re not interested in something, they’ll let you know and likely won’t thank anyone for asking them to do something they don’t want to do in the first place anyway!
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Don’t Let Emotion Rule Your Argument Or Push For Action
As a leader and manager, you want to be able to convince others to do things that may be out of their comfort zone.
To do this, you need to keep your emotions in check and understand that it’s OK for people not to agree with you or like what you’re proposing, and sometimes even when they do!
Don’t let your emotions get in the way of your message. Stay true to who you are as a person and focus on being genuine about what’s best for the business as well as for yourself personally.
Don’t be afraid of showing emotion; just don’t let it dictate your argument. Understand that there are times when showing vulnerability or emotion can help build trust between both parties involved.
But at other times it may come off negatively or not have any impact at all on getting someone else’s buy-in (or “yes”).
Don’t Try To Use Logic Or Facts
Don’t try to use logic or facts. When we’re trying to get someone to do something, we tend to use logic and facts as the basis for our argument. But this doesn’t work because it’s not how people are wired people will only follow what they think is right, not what you think is right.
Don’t say “I need you to.” Instead of saying “I need you,” say something like: “Would you be willing?” or ask them if they would consider doing it (without any pressure).
Don’t say “I need you to do X.” Instead of saying that, frame your request using conditional phrases such as: “If I could count on your help…” or “Would you be willing if we started on Friday?”
Don’t say “I need YOU” all by itself without context (e.g., don’t just say: “You should…”). You don’t always have control over other people’s behavior or choices and even when it seems like they should know better than their self-interest sometimes!
The best way is often not about being pushy but about being persuasive by working together towards common goals rather than focusing on differences between individuals who could otherwise work together more effectively if only given time and patience
Talk About Their Needs, Not Yours
When you talk about other people’s needs, they are more likely to agree with and follow through on your request. When you give them a specific example of how following through will benefit them, they’ll be more likely to do what you ask.
For example: “I’d like it if we could do this project together because I know that it would be beneficial for our department.” Or, “It would be great if we could have a meeting this afternoon because I think we can come up with some new ideas.”
In each example above, the person making the request is talking about their thoughts and feelings (in this case that doing these tasks together or having an important meeting will benefit them).
The second part of this rule is also important to be clear about what kind of action you want from someone else by being specific about what type of outcome will happen as a result.
Talk To One Person At A Time
It’s important to remember that not every person is going to be interested in what you have to say. That’s okay! It’s their choice whether or not they want to listen.
If they’re not ready or don’t feel like it, there’s no sense in trying too hard. Instead, just move on to another person and talk with them instead of continuing with someone who isn’t willing to listen.
To make things easier for yourself, try taking only one person at a time.
This way, if someone doesn’t want your advice or isn’t interested in talking about the issue at hand (by giving little response), then it will be easy for you just move on without getting discouraged or feeling bad about yourself.
Be Clear About What You Want
You want something. You want people to do something. But instead of using logic, facts, and persuasion, you find yourself trying to make your case with emotion and yelling.
As much as you might hate it, there’s a good chance that the other person is feeling pretty negative about your request (or even just indifferent).
So if you’re going to change their minds, you need to make them feel differently before they can be persuaded by your argument or rationale. The easiest way? Make them feel positive about what they’re doing or why they should do it.
Conclusion
When you want to get people to do things without sounding pushy, it’s important to make sure that everyone involved understands what the other person wants and how they can be helpful.
The key is making sure that everyone feels like they are working together on something, not being forced into something by someone else.
It’s also important not to let your own emotions or opinions get in the way of getting what you want out of a situation try focusing more on how your request will benefit others than yourself if possible.
Further Reading
Ways to Get People to Do Things They Don’t Want to Do Short Description: Discover effective strategies for motivating people even when faced with resistance.
7 Ways to Avoid Being a Pushover Short Description: Learn techniques to assert yourself while maintaining healthy relationships.
50 Tips to Get People to Like You Without Pleasing Others Short Description: Explore actionable advice on building genuine connections without sacrificing your authenticity.
FAQs
How can I influence people’s behavior without being pushy?
You can influence behavior through understanding their motivations and needs. Focus on empathetic communication and providing value that resonates with them.
What are some ways to assert myself without becoming a pushover?
Asserting yourself involves setting clear boundaries, expressing your needs confidently, and actively listening to others’ perspectives.
How can I build genuine connections without trying to please everyone?
Authentic connections are built on shared interests, active listening, and sincere interactions. Focus on forming relationships with those who appreciate you for who you are.
What strategies can I use to motivate people to take action?
Motivation stems from addressing individuals’ desires, concerns, and aspirations. Presenting information in a compelling manner and showing the benefits can drive action.
Is it possible to avoid being pushy while still achieving my goals?
Yes, it is. By focusing on collaboration, seeking win-win solutions, and respecting others’ autonomy, you can accomplish your goals without resorting to pushy tactics.
Costantine Edward is a digital marketing expert, freelance writer, and entrepreneur who helps people attain financial freedom. I’ve been working in marketing since I was 18 years old and have managed to build a successful career doing what I love.